Planning Presentation

After my tutorial with Matt I feel a lot clear on what to talk about in my presentation. 
Notes to include:

Slide 1- My past and why I'm here. I started a chemistry degree and changed my mind.
What I thought illustration was? What do I think it is now?

Slide 2- LCA first year
-making friends, going to key club to many times, too many hangovers, going to a lot of gigs, laziness
- but I learnt a LOT

Slide 3 and 4- Successes, show the work I like, sticker, how to poster
- Sticker/Illustrator/Vectors- I was all about detail before this year and I never thought I would like simple shape work but I love it? Dominic Kirkston
- I feel my mains success is actually learning the process of making work and the thought process around making work rather than the actual work I've made
-using sketchbooking and rough, not something I've done before at all really
-vectors
-transformative moments? illustrator visits, visual language module

Slide 5 and 6- Challenges
- I have definitely got out of the mindset of every sketchbook page has to be beautiful but I still have it in the back of my head that I can't take certain risks in case it doesn't turn out so well? Why am I so scared of failure?
-my attention span is about 5 seconds, procrastinating, when I am in the zone I am in the zone for a while though
- I have no confidence in my work and need reassurance all the time, I need to learn to have confidence in my work and stop letting my worries and overthinking from holding me back, I need to GO FOR IT
- show work I don't like and talk about it- illumination? persons of note?
- I think you can tell in some of my work that I've struggled with it and I haven't enjoyed making it.
- my book!!!! I think I overcomplicated this brief immensley and maybe it had a good concept and thinking behind it but I probably should have gone for a more simple idea and executed it better, made it difficult for myself
-looking back now, I didn't make the briefs my own at all like other students did, I felt restricted by some of the brief but I definitely didn't push myself enough into making it my own
-every crit I would think ' why didn't I think to do that?'
- When I struggle with a brief I hide from it 
-I didn't like much of my work this year at all but I've learnt so much that I feel I'm ready to make work I like
- Maybe I'm too hard on myself, definitely worry too much about this whole style thing, I think about how to make my work abstract/illustration-y/ stylized when that's exactly what Jamie and Matt said not to do but I just need to focus on what I want to do.

Slide 7 and 8- Where do I want my work to go?
-I want to spend more time on crafting, feel I've got impatient with it when I used to spend hours and hours 
- Feel like I've had an epiphany from this brief forcing me to think in detail about my work
-I want it to encompass me and my interests more and I've realised I enjoy it more then and can then make more work
- Why haven't I drawn things I enjoy drawing and only thought about what I 'should' be drawing?
-themes I want to include in my work: myth and magic, gothic, strange, other worldly, halloween, horror, space, witches.
I've realised these themes are in my life everywhere and why haven't I brought it very much into my work ? the films I watch(horror, fantasy, documentaries), documentaries on space, the unknown! the music I listen to(metal, heavy), my clothes, my bedroom, examples??
Music I like is extreme and I like that theres a lot to it GO INTO THIS MORE
WSS? ENTER SHIKARI? KORN? escape from reality, want this theme to be reflected in my work
WSS and Enter Shikari both do what they want
Korn lyrics, screaming FUCK on a breakdown? Why do I like that so much? I think its the thought of being different
What do these things mean to me?? I don't want it to be cliche, It's more than just the aesthetic that I like.. desire to have knowledge beyond ordinary human understanding! The imagination and mystery!

This is the direction I want my work to go in but I still don't know how I want to situate myself as an artist or what context I envisage my work to exist in. I think that's ok and I need to stop worrying about it so much. With more experimenting and finding what areas interest me, this will become apparent.

Slide 9- Other practitioners
Who inspires me? analyse why I like them critically
Vania Zouraliliov, Sabrina Scott, Katie Scott, Holly Exley
Holly Exley Youtube videos- showed her old work and shows she made her style and career over time, by focusing on making the work she likes
Katie Scott- botanical illustrator, all I was interested in when I was younger, I wanted to be a florist, I think I would like this but with dark colours?
I like delicate and beautiful but I also like strange and the unknown and other wordly
I find when I look at other peoples work I feel so motivated and inspired, I need to do this more
How do I want people to feel when they look at my work?
Enchanted! Under a spell, charmed.

Slide 10- Manifesto, next year 
- Get up earlier
- Make the briefs my own
- Stop thinking so much 
-Draw for pleasure in free time
-Stop comparing to professional illustrators and students
-Don't be defeated by others successes, be inspired

Need to make the powerpoint slides and cue cards now 

I've gone over what I want to say a few times now and its about 9 minutes, maybe I should cut out a couple of things? I'm so worried that I won't present well and my mind will go blank and I'll forget stuff anyway :(